The Life I Owe

Back when I was younger, I wondered why there are so many stars in the sky. I wondered where they come from. I used to love star gazing in our rooftop and I would wish upon every star that seemed to twinkle more brightly and radiantly among the other gaseous masses in the night sky. I would wish upon them that my dreams would come true.

Now that I’m a bit older, I’ve realized that fulfilling my dreams is not as easy as wishing upon a star. There’s more to it than just believing that it would come true. It is maybe just the first step because along the way still much is required – a lot of hard work, more patience, even more perseverance, and most importantly, a huge amount of faith.

Well, I still do wish upon stars. After all, there wouldn’t be a heaven full of them if it weren’t meant for us to have endless dreams. And no matter how countless and vast those stars may appear, God created them all. As Isaiah 40:26 puts it, “Lift your eyes and look to the heavens: Who created all these? He who brings out the starry host one by one, and calls them each by name. Because of His great power and mighty strength, not one of them is missing.” So if He takes care of the stars, how could He not take much more care of me? That is why everything that I hope for, all that I long for are lifted up to Him, because He alone can make my dreams come true.

artist: Barlow Girl

Why, why are You still here with me
Didn’t You see what I’ve done?
In my shame I want to run and hide myself
But it’s here I see the truth
I don’t deserve You

But I need You to love me, and I
I won’t keep my heart from You this time
And I’ll stop this pretending that I can
Somehow deserve what I already have

Ineed You to love me

I, I have wasted so much time
Pushing You away from me
I just never saw how You could cherish me
‘Cause You’re a God who has all things
And still You want me

Your love makes me forget what I have been
Your love makes me see who I really am
Your love makes me forget what I have been

when no one else knows how i feel

your love for me is proven real

when no one else knows where i’ve been

you run to me with arms stretched and

you hold me in your arms again

if i could just sit with you awhile

if you could just hold me

nothing could touch me

tough i’m wounded

though i die

if i could just sit with you awhile

i need you to hold me

moment by moment

’til forever passes by

The Revelation

I gasped the worn and tattered work,

Its pages brittle to the touch;

The ink was faded, but defined

Each word I drank, deriving much.

Before my disbelieving eyes

A group of words converged on me;

They forced me to lay down the work –

I turned to face what I should see.

Within the “glass” I saw the corpse,

A ghastly gray glowed in the night;

But colors suddenly pierced my gaze,

The Word had brought my place to Light.

The truths so old and veiled before

Were now made vivid, clear, and true;

I glanced into the mirror once more

And found that all had been made new.

My eyes were opened to the fact

That God, the One on high, wants me!

What’s more, a purpose He has planned

For what my life shall one day be.

O God, a brand-new me I see!

it has been a week now since the start of summer classes..

well, that is for them who actually took the summer classes but not for me who cancelled my subjects during the registration

and uhmm..that was for some reason that I’d rather keep to myself (bet you wouldn’t want to hear anything like “I was just walking along the acad oval when suddenly a voice inside me told me not to take summer classes anymore”)

here’s just some things I’m going to do this vacation lest I become a bum again (like I don’t want to remember when because it did me no good)

• finish the Chronicles of Narnia…I’m down to the last two books…really enjoying myself more than I think I will and I’m learning a lot also

• clean my room and if I’d have a brilliant idea I might as well decorate it or maybe I could repaint it purple

• fill up my journal…I became inconsistent because I got wounded up with journalizing accounts receivables and payables…I’ve only a few pages to write my thoughts on and then I’m going to buy me a new one

• get a license

• tutor my 5-year old cousin..my aunt’s just glad to hear I wasn’t taking summer classes..this isn’t bad at all because we made a great deal

• go to laguna and get a good swim

• regular exercise or try to jog around our subdivision every morning…I’m almost always infuriated whenever my brother teases me I’m getting fat

• learn to cook…and by this I meant real cooking not just cooking rice (and I’m actually craving for chocolate chip cookies at this very moment…not that it has anything to do with it)

• master the guitar

• learn photoshop or flash; and

• most importantly, make myslef of use in the house…do the laundry perhaps or iron clothes or wash the car..well on second thought I’m just going to resort to cooking or setting the table or maybe washing the dishes

hmmm…as I well know, i probably won’t accomplish all of this..but one thing’s for sure I’m going to have a good rest this summer and I believe that’s what God wants me to have.. He’s preparing me for battle..i don’t know when, I just know it’ll be soon

and yes of course…spend a lot of time in quietness and trust…and try to find myself (again?) ‘coz it seems in this past few weeks I’ve been lost inside of me and I feel (as it is said, “don’t depend on feelings”..yet I still feel it anyway) there’s going to be something that’ll make me be off my head

by Stacie Orrico

As I rest against this cold, hard wall
Will you pass me by?
Will you criticize me as I sit and cry?
I had fought so hard and thought that all my battles had been won
Only to find the war has just begun

Is He not strong enough?
Is He not pure enough?
To break me, pour me out, and start again
Is He not brave enough?
To take one chance on me
Please can I have one chance to start again?

Will my weakness for an hour make me suffer for a lifetime?
Is there anyway to be made whole again?
If I’m healed,renewed, and find forgiveness find the strength I’ve never had
Will my scars forever ruin all God’s plan?

Is He not strong enough?
Is He not pure enough?
To break me, pour me out, and start again
Is He not brave enough?
To take one chance on me
Please can I have one chance to start again?

He took my life into his hands and it turned it all around
In my most desperate circumstance
It’s there I’ve finally found

That You are strong enough
That You are pure enough
To break me, pour me out and start again
That You are brave enough
To take one chance on me
Oh Thank You for my chance to start again

I did things because I knew I could succeed

I didn’t want to do other things because I feared failure

But because I didn’t take the risk and proved to myself that I wouldn’t fail

I will not have the chance to realize what could have happened

But then there are those that I took that I will never regret in my whole life

I’ve come to realize that I can do anything I set my mind to if I’m willing to go through the process.. if I just have faith

yeah, faith

I already took two philosophy classes and this is how they define faith

“FAITH is without logical proof”

..oh heck, I suppose that means I’m an illogical person if I put my faith on something

Well, illogical it is.. I think faith is personal

I believe there are a lot of things in this world that can’t be explained

Faith is no mere example

It is being sure of the things we hope for and certain of things we do not see

it seems to be a remarkable force that brings about an experience of complete, total inner peace and contentment

It somehow gives us an empowerment to accomplish the seemingly impossible or the ordinary extraordinarily

a mountain-moving faith, that is

just be careful where you put your complete trust on..

¹The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the works of his hands.

I’ve always loved the sunset. It never fails to put a smile on my face, believing that God painted it with His own hands to remind me of His unfailing love. So whenever I see this kind of scene outside my window, I am always amazed and awed by the intricate beauty of God’s creations. By the way, I personally took the pictures.

⁷The law of the LORD is perfect, reviving the soul.

The statutes of the LORD are trustworthy, making wise the simple.

⁸The precepts of the LORD are right, giving joy to the heart.

The commands of the LORD are radiant, giving light to the eyes.

⁹The fear of the LORD is pure, enduring forever.

The ordinances of the LORD are sure and altogether righteous.

¹⁰They are more precious than gold, than much pure gold.

They are sweeter than honey, than honey from the comb.

¹¹By them is your servant warned; in keeping them there is great reward.

It’s hard, I know. But it is God Himself who writes His commands in my heart so that I may live by them everyday – to trust, hope, and love. To live in order to please God and do this more and more through His unfailing love that surrounds me.

¹⁴May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart

be pleasing in your sight O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.

would you believe me if i said...
that we are the ones who can make the change
in the world today...
would you believe me if i said...
that all of your dreams in your heart
can come true... today...
would you believe me if i said...
that life could be all that you want it to be... today...

and if i had wings i would fly
'cause all that i need, You are
and if the world caved in around me
to You i'd still hold on
cause You're all that i believe
and the one that created me
JESUS.. because of You.. i'm FREE

would you believe me if i said...
that God can make miracles happen today
would you believe me if i said...
that you dont need to wait for the answers before..
you step out in faith..
would you believe me if i said
that nothing is ever IMPOSSIBLE.. for God..

just live your life.. with God inside
you wont regret one moment of it
and give all that you can for God... for God